Wedding Tips & Advice

Unexpected Gifts

Since it’s the week of Christmas, this topic seems to run through my head a lot, and into my emails. What do you do, when you receive an unexpected or unwanted wedding gift? Let’s hear it in the Bride’s words:

My future mother in law gifted me something that doesn’t match my wedding theme and just isn’t my style. I know she wants to help, and I don’t want to offend her, but I would never use these things. It’s my wedding, but I don’t want to sound unappreciative or start off on the wrong foot. Help!

First, if you don’t hate the items, but they just don’t match the wedding day, then you still might be able to find another use for them. If they would be good at a bridal shower, welcome dinner, rehearsal dinner, etc. then use them for an event surrounding the wedding. You can thank her and tell her what you’ll use it for and then say you’re hoping to find one that is/looks like/does ___ for the wedding day.


To go a little further with this, if you feel comfortable, I’d suggest giving her a genuine thanks for her interest and ask her to shop with you. Together, you can hunt for the perfect thing that will match the theme. It’s a great way to bond and it will give you a chance to get to know each other in person. Hopefully, you can show her some things you’re thinking about buying for the wedding and point out what you do like or what your style is.


If she continues to suggest things you dislike, tell her why or the theme again, but be gentle and genuine. Be clear about naming the feel and look at theme of your wedding. Conflict isn’t easy, but it’s the perfect opportunity to build a report of genuine trust.


I’m going to bet you both want to be a happy family! 🙂


Good luck this holiday! Have a Very Merry Christmas!